Take Courage My Heart

Travel restrictions. Grocery hoarding. Lockdown of communities. Checkpoints are all I see in the media and in social media nowadays.

STRESS is written everywhere.

I know this is such a trying time for us but negativity doesn’t really help when everyone and everything is falling apart. The system, your workplace, the government. Let’s try to source out all the good vibes from each other and pray. Take a moment to meditate and count the blessings that we have right now. This might not be the ideal time for you to do this but trust me, you will feel way better after doing it.

Take courage my heart
Stay steadfast my soul
He’s in the waiting

Hold onto your hope
As your triumph unfolds
He’s never failing

And You who hold the stars
Who call them each by name
Will surely keep, Your promise to me
That I will rise, in Your victory

Bethel Music

Listening to this song gives me the hope that I need in this very difficult times and I want to share this with you. God is with us and he will never ever fail us. This are all trials which eventually will unfold and reveal the true purpose why God is allowing this.

For God so loved the world, as to give his only begotten Son; that whosoever believeth in him, may not perish, but may have life everlasting. John 3:16

When you are in doubt, in fear, and restless, close your eyes, talk to the Lord. ‘Cause remember. God loves us and He loves YOU.

Another Trip Around the Sun

I stopped counting after 25 though I know ageing is inevitable, I still feel the drag of me counting the years remaining in my fertile years.

As a woman, this is our struggle. IF you are married and doesn’t have kids, your birthday can be a bit stressful for you knowing that you have less eggs and less chances. Me and my husband have been trying for X years now and we are still praying continuously to be blessed with an angel. On times like this, the only hand that we can hold on to is our God. It’s hard, not knowing the “WHEN” but we make it easy by knowing the “WHO” to trust.

I always ask A this question: What if God decides not to give us a child?, by Gods grace, A always responds the same: You will always be enough for me… the sweetest thing right? but of course we are still not letting go of this desire in our hearts as we haven’t really venture to all of the options that are available now. Don’t get me wrong, for every cycle that I have comes with disappointment and discouragement. People always asks us on when and if we have problems but we had everything checked and everything is A OK… on the other hand sometimes people will give positive comments / encouragements like, it’s ok.. other couple had to wait 10 years to have a child.. which to be honest, doesn’t really console me.

Having this want is a burden for me, and I always pray that God will change my heart to be aligned to HIS plans instead. I just want to forget my wants and cling to His ways instead. Human as I am though, this prayer will be my constant prayer till I become 50.

Anyway, Happy Birthday To ME!

Rainy day on summer.

Wet. Cold. Muddy. Is the streets of Melbourne when I woke up today. I hated this kind of weather cause it makes everything seems so complicated. Going to the tram stop, walking to work and crossing the streets. Today is Wednesday and hump day for me is always something that I am looking forward to cause it only means that I only need to come to work for 2 more days. Not this week though.

My parents and my brother are here and we have planned to go outback and do some camping and fishing (that if we will be able to get some fish). So we have decided to take some time off from tomorrow till Friday so that we can have a long weekend. Almost everything that we will bring with us were borrowed from our friends. Tent, esky, fishing pole, and what not. We have decided to go to the Great Ocean Road and camp at Apollo bay on where we can unwind, experience a campers’ life and still have a decent toilet to do our business.

The plan is to drive along the Great ocean road on our first day, and camp for the rest of our stay. A beer on hand would be a bonus. The fishing site is just nearby the area so that would be very convenient for us as. We will bring our Sherlock with us so that he can enjoy the outback with us and hopefully he can be more at ease this time than the last time we went there.

It is forecasted to be raining on Friday afternoon, and camping + rain is not actually a good duo. Mud will be all over us and not to mention the cold weather/nights it will bring whilst the 6 of us like sitting ducks crowding in 1 tent. This situation brings me back on our first camping experience. Heavy rain, thunderstorms and a wining friend too afraid that the rainwater will seep through our tent.

It will be a chilly morning but we are still hoping that we can release our stress hormones and sip some hot coffee while staring at cows drinking water from the river. I am sure that regardless of the weather condition, we will be relaxed and would be able to bond with each other, knowing that the technology that we are all addicted to have limited supply of batteries 🙂

I am writing. Again.

No, this isn’t the first time that I attempted to write again. I have been trying to revive this dead site of my mind in this web of social media. But, then again, this is a part of some footprints of myself that I am trying to ink in the internet. Continue reading “I am writing. Again.”

My plan may always not His plans

I have been married to my wonderful spouse for 3 and a half years now. It has been a breathtaking ride as we discover each others flaws and learn to love each other even more. Technically, we have been together since 2009 as a couple but it is true that discovering each other will only start when you start living with your other half. Currently, it’s just the 2 of us and we are still waiting for our own little one to fill our home with laughter and joy while having those sleepless nights. LOL.

When we got married, we planned that we are going to try on having a baby after 2 years. After 1 year of being married though and seeing a lot of young couples surrounding us being prego and all, we have decided to try it half year early instead. Then we realised that the main reason why it is called trying is because, you can only try on having it but not really being assured that you are going to have it. When I was young, I thought being knocked up will be very easy but it wasn’t at all (or maybe just for us).

Caution: some information below maybe sensitive for readers below 18.

Continue reading “My plan may always not His plans”